Last night Jessie-aged six years old now, came into the lounge crying.
"I miss my Nanny, I want her back!"
I looked at James. His Mum passed away almost 2 years ago.
Jessie had a good relationship with her Nanny.
Sue would visit 2 times a year, as she lived in Wales. We would do the same, taking Summer and christmas trips to the west coast of Wales.
We were always aware that Jessie had been affected and saddened by the loss of her Nanny, but as I held her and told her it was O.K to feel sad, It stirred my heart.
This life comes with many pains, strife and difficulties. It often throws us out of our comfort zones and forces us to view ourselves in the light of the bigger picture.
Life here is short. In the light of eternity, this life is just a passing moment. Yet for us, in our human state, experiencing pain, sorrow, grief, fear & loss it can consume us at times.
Here was a little girl, at the very young age of six, having to deal with the ache in her little heart of losing someone she loved dearly. Not fully understanding why and wanting to have her back.
"She is in heaven isn't she Mummy?" This thought gave her obvious comfort, but I could tell if the answer was not a 'yes' , it would leave her feeling hopeless. As that would mean, despite the pain she felt now, she would never see her Nanny again.
"Yes she is." I replied.
I encouraged Jessie to go and get her Lion king, a soft toy. Nanny had given it to Jessie in her final weeks. Jessie had once asked me if Nanny had given it to her because she knew she was going to die, so that Jessie would not forget her Nanny.
She went upstairs to get her Lion King.
James followed her upstairs. Together they looked through photographs and video clips of Jessie with her Nanny. A bit later on Jessie wanted to show me also.
We sat and looked through old pictures, memories and clips. There were also pictures of Jessie as a toddler, and of Ellie as a baby. Amusing clips of Jessie dancing and giggling with her cute, high pitched baby voice. Ellie, unable to sit alone, and sharing a bath for the first time with her 'big sister'.
Memories of wonderful family days and exciting beginnings flooded me. Every memory was precious. Seeing jessie on my lap. a much taller, leaner grown up six year old made me realize how quickly days pass.
Mixed emotions filled my heart as I looked at the past. Those days are now gone. I can not re live those moments. I can not turn back the clock and see, touch, hold, embrace those children, or the people we have loved and lost. They are only memories to me now. It evoked many thoughts and feelings within. It made me want to make the most of every present moment with my precious children. It stirred a sense of slight sadness for the days that had passed so quickly and it made me look to my heavenly Father for the comfort of his eternal love.
The knowledge of my eternal reward brought comfort to my earthly, fragile existence.
Whatever happens in this life. God is with us. He holds all things. He gives us rest when we are weary. He comforts , even the tiniest, of hearts when they are full of sadness. He gives us the gift of love, to share with our children, our friends, neighbors and our families.
As we become increasingly aware of our immortality, it can have a profound effect on us. We can choose to be consumed by fear and uncertainty or we can thank God, that despite the pains of this life, we have an eternal security. Here we will spend unhindered love, joy, peace and life to the full without the pain and suffering we regularly experience here.
Thank God for that! Thank God for Jesus!
15 As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
18 with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.
19 The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.
20 Praise the LORD, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
21 Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
22 Praise the LORD, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.